When moving forward is moving backwards!?

When you don't step outside your idyllic fantasy for a moment and take a good look at how things are in what seems rather comedy than political public stand-up in Egypt, multinational pumping stumbles and moves MENA hubs out of Cairo.
When you have to delay your internship year of hospital practice for a year until your father turns 60 so that you would be exempted from your hateful compulsory army service, your calculating mental timetable of your future plans snoozes only on your side because the universe doesn't adhere to a time clock meanwhile, your bf's timing in the plans moves a fair step forward in the "normal world".
When you spend more 'mum-is-visiting-until-march' time you get to have space for more interesting grown-ups conversations with your mother, you figure out that you got it many times wrong/hateful as a kid but only now you hear her side of the story so you finally feel more empathetic with the forward her but less with your self-victimizing passive aggressive emotional father.
When it's not quite daytime and not quite nighttime while you are making yourself open to messages about your future. This in-between place is symbolic to your life right now; not knowing where - or how - to go to the next step, Escapes from reality can be wonderful detours if only occasionally allowed; past that healthful point, they take a toll on your well-being.
When you electrify whatever room you walk into, you should finally believe that if you are entertaining angry or vengeful thoughts about someone - even if you never show your anger or seek revenge on that person - you are causing harm. But you aren't causing harm to the one you are upset with; you are causing harm to yourself. By allowing negative thoughts to eat away at you, then you are building a wall around yourself. Each negative or hostile thought is like a brick in that wall. The higher you build it, the harder it will be for good thoughts and positive energy to enter. Let go of what you can't control.
When you know it in your heart that the 40% - where you are only 6% of - of the society can't face the opponent mal-educated religion driven 60%. You feel uninspired, ideas are eluding you, your creativity seems oppressed, your energy is flagging. Then they tell you if you face the music now, you can turn it into a symphony!?