I really donno where or how to start writing about my trip to Vienna to celebrate 1st anniversary with Sunny. The city is really amazing; well-organized, breathtaking architecture, great urban planning and it's too green that it looked like a big golf course from the plane! You also get to feel at night that "the city really slept". When everything closes down. When you feel that every simple thing has a sound, so you start wondering what kind of shape does the silence have? A shape of an umbrella to protect you against the rain of the little noise that the city has? Or maybe it's a package, where the secret comes from!
Being with Sunny in his home country was amazing, I saw a side of him that I never saw before. It made me feel him more, his culture, his way of thinking, his lifestyle. I was so happy when he was showing me around and telling me this and that about his country and its endless stories.
It was the perfect timing in our relationship for this trip, Although I was a little bit worried if it will be suffocating to live together for 2 weeks but to the contrary, it felt great! I loved every second of it! I loved the idea of being able to instantly tell him anything on my mind without having to text him or call him or waiting until I see him. I also feel-now that I'm back to Cairo-that now is the time for the step of moving in together so that our relationship grow even more.
Being the "foreigner" felt kind of weird but in a good way, they don't stare at you in the streets like here in Egypt, nobody would judge you or point or make fun of you even if you were wearing a crazy outfit. It makes you feel that people here in Egypt have literally got no life, they are stuck in a vicious circle of corrupted or misunderstood religions, politics, norms..etc!
It was very liberating not to feel "odd" or "not fitting in" or to be able to kiss in public(cheesy but I couldn't help it) or publicly display intimacy or simply not having to "justify your love"! I felt it even more when I've met his family, had dinners with them, got closer to them, felt welcomed and they're just so...so complete in a way. Like they have something that I will never have, ever. Either I wasn't born with it, or it was beaten out of me, or maybe, maybe I made myself into a self-fulfilling prophecy, and I really am a borderline personality. Or maybe I excessively believed that you cannot design a life that works without first drafting a clear blueprint. And you cannot construct a life that has meaning without first laying a solid foundation. You are the architect of your life. Not your emotionally distant father. Not your overly critical mother. Not your petty, fair-weather friends. You!
It made me wonder; what are we supposed to believe? That the same god who made us wants us to be lonely & frustrated all our lives while the rest of world is free to make love and have families? And if it's what God intended, to have a family, to have faith, and to have a normal life. And if God challenges us like this, so we'll choose good, so we'll triumph over evil. Then it's not a choice. God already made the choice for me!
Being with someone really changes you somehow. You become less self-centered. You start thinking about everything in your life in a different way, even the little tiny details. You smile whenever your partner thinks or says the same thing like you in the same time. You wouldn't feel insecure when he sees through your walls. You feel that there is still more to your relationship in the future just when you see a certain look in his eyes, or when you discover interesting sides of him every now and then, or when he discovers a new spot in your body that you never knew before how much it turns you on, or when your anniversary dinner is on the Danube just like how your first date was on the Nile!
P.S the post title is a tribute for Asmahan's "Layali El Ons" song about Vienna
PPS you can follow me on twitter now!
