You've been notified!

All the names that are mentioned in my posts are totally fake but they are related in a way to the real person's identity, so you do the maths!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Wrinkle wrinkle little scar, take two!

Here you go the rest of the lovely comments:

Ice queer, allow me to do the replies for you :
Batates, plain and simple, Gay people choose to act their sexuality, not their orientation, an easy example, related to the post is easily seen in the straight world, the difference between you and a nun is that you chose to get married and she chooses chastity, but none of you two chose to like men over women i guess.
I don't talk religion but for starters qawm loot weren't punished for homosexual act, but for possession crimes, they happenned to be homos but that wasn't their sole sin. and no i am not saying it is not considered a sin by religion, i am just correcting a historical fact.

About the effect on the society, well batates, how would you like a guy attracted to men choosing to act straight, getting married to you or your sister and not fulfilling his marital duties and leaving his wife unfulfilled sexually and wondering why am i not enough for him? does this scenario sound better than two men having sex in their own bedroom (mind you, i didn't throw the effect that bad marital relationship would have on their kids if they had them).

One last thing, I am horrified by the debate on the priest, when did being gay become equivalent to pedophilia?
If you are not willing to check psychiatric texts, read the novel lolita or simply watch the news and see that little girls get molested as well by priests, sheikhs and in many instances by their own very straight fathers and mothers. Unfortunately child abuse is very widespread and it is not restricted to gay people as people might think.
By Blog Reader on "Beauty and the Priest!"

I have to tell you Nour that your war of writing is actually more than wonderful...very enjoyable I give you that.

"The priest sent me to heaven"
hehe...well played :)
By Innate_Inanenuss on "Beauty and the Priest!"

I can totally relate to this post, I've been there. Personally I stopped feeling like I don't belong when I stopped hiding, I used to hide my ideas, my background, my dreams etc. I then realized that half of the times, the rejection was in my head,and actually when being confronted with my own difference, discussing it without confrontation, without slashing back or faking built unexpected bonds or simply respectful acquaintances.

About the promiscuity, Through my own therapy I came to realize It's not a matter of quantity as much as of motives and feeling, I used to (and still do) use sex as a validation, a get back, a hideout and a thousand other million reasons, I was/am promiscuous while just having sex once a month. Watch "Girl interrupted", there is a scene explaining promiscuity beautifully.

I wish u the best of luck.
By Anonymous on "100 years of iso-sex-lation!"

If this therapist thinks he can strip you of your humanity, your dignity and your identity (in your case, gay), then just leave him. I am going to tell you something, which you may hate me for. I respect you so much for facing up to your parents and for coming out of the closet. But, you know that your society and our society is not ready for that. Nor are your parents. So, why not maneuver things around? Why not have it your way both ways? Be gay and have your parents on your side. Why not have them for lunch before they have you for dinner. I am not asking you to deny who you are. On the contrary, be who you are amongst your friends, and everybody else. Except your parents because unfortunately you have to answer to them and you live with them under the same roof. So you need to be smarter in order to avoid the headache they keep giving you. Unless you move out and be independent and be your own man.

And your blog... you don't need to write about interesting men or interesting sexual adventures. You can simply write about yourself, about a boring day, about thoughts, about music. And trust me, there is always someone out there who is interested to read your blog and read what you have to say. This is a very healthy place to unwind... and to be yourself too. Just my advice.
By poshlemon on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

i know what you mean about not wanting to do the assignments, you feel like it won't change you at all and is a waste of time. The only good thing about them is that they keep you thinking about the sessions mid-week, so you continue to make forward motion. Not sure what to say about that. It's not homework, you're not at school:-S

Reading your post makes me feel like you are hovering between hope of some kind of good change, fear of the unknown in the future (we're all like that sometimes!) and questioning.. is it all worth it really?

I'd say keep going. It's like going on a holiday. If you've booked and paid to go for 2 weeks you've got to GO for two weeks. Likewise with your sessions, keep at them until you really can't take it anymore or until you feel like you've arrived at some kind of finishing point. Don't put yourself under pressure. Hey, your parents are paying for it. A lot of people DON'T GO because they can't afford it. So you are lucky. In a way.
It sounds like you're getting to know yourself better which is amazing. Sounds like SOMETHING positive is coming out of the sessions at least!

Keep it up, and don't shut down your blog;)
By Anonymous on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

If u r like me in anyway then ur "new" depression is not caused by the therapy, the therapy simply uncovered it, there comes a moment in life when someone or something just forcefully takes ur head out of the sand and afterwards it's just up to u to sink it back in the sand or start seeing things as they are, whether they r good or bad.
By the way, not feeling anything is a feeling.
Good luck buddy, i am sure u'll overcome this one too!
By Anonymous on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

I have a few questions in response to some of the comments.. What's wrong with concentrating on sex? And what's wrong with promiscuity? And what does being gay have to do with promiscuity or concentrating on sex?
By Wanderin Scarab on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

IQ I think Im the anon you meant and no that wasnt me. Ive been sinking myself into work trying not to deal with some family crisis that well I can not really do any thing about.
Anyways, Im sorry to read that you are not feeling well. My advice is pull yourself out. I agree with one comment that its the discovery process that you started with your therapist that is giving you a different way to see life and well as we grow up we realize life isnt always as we thought it is or even have one side to it.
I hope you do not follow poshlemon advice. I might disagree with you on many levels but having the courage to face your issues is one thing that makes me admire you. I just hope you take your therapy more serious or may be you do but you do not reflect that in so many words.
Why not share your feeling down with the therapist? ask him how you can deal with it and prevent it from getting worse?
As for the sex issue. Well, we all care about sex because it is part of who we are and yes it does affect your mood alot and could make life more bearable if it is with someone you love. It is however one of many parts of our identities and life and it should not entirly color the way we see things or life.
I do hope you keep on writing and like many comments I think I will enjoy it more if it had more you and less "men". You have a nice talent and would be sad to see it wasted plus I think writing is a good way to get over negative ideas.
Hope you feel better soon
By Anonymous on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

only problem with promiscuity is that it becomes an addiction and the desire for sex becomes insatiable..

Keep doubting...
By Will E. on "I wish you and ur fuckin therapy a lovely night!"

"perhaps we are all refugees from something"
i am not sure if its came out of u or out of the coke.. but its totally right.
may be that is one of many facts u can get from being with urself and see the life from different perspective.. very unique way of life.
By echo on "Thou hast the keys of Paradise; Oh, just sex and mighty cocaine!"

sweetie, i hope you know that drugs are addictive. you're screwed up enough already!?


ps he ain't pure inside. what kind of message is 'wanna fuck?'

ok i know why u went for it, would do the same thing too, definitely, but you're worth so much more, i feel it


don't hate me!
By Anonymous on "Thou hast the keys of Paradise; Oh, just sex and mighty cocaine!"

he's not pure inside, my dear. i'm going to tell you a few things i tell my girlfriends on a regular basis when they complain about the guys not giving them the respect they feel they deserve. if you present yourself in a way that says "I'll accept the crumbs you drop" (by crumbs, I mean the guy isn't going out of his way for her), then he's just gonna keep giving you nothing but crumbs of his attention. everyone wants to be loved and needed at the end of the day. he's saying "i'll kiss" eh ya3ny? like throwing a dog a bone? please. from everything you've said, b is neither "classy" nor "decent." i think many times, you meet someone messed up in the head..someone who sporadically gives you attention..and it drives you crazy. you want to be the person he needs, you want to be the person who fixes him.

whether you recognize this or not, it's probably the case. it gets you nowhere. sometimes you choose this person and hope he'll change but, honey, he won't. he will never treat you the way you secretly wish you'd be treated. you'll still feel empty whether or not you will admit it.
i realize the things i've said are harsh. i'm not being holier than thou because i've been there, too. at some point, you have to decide what you want for yourself, what you DEMAND for yourself, and take nothing less. if you accept a whole lot of nothing, you can expect to be given a whole lot of nothing.
By Anonymous on "Thou hast the keys of Paradise; Oh, just sex and mighty cocaine!"

Ice Queer..

I don't know about cocaine.. but I concur sex is good. I have an entire blog dedicated to sex, because it's good stuff. I think everyone deserves good sex. In fact, I have a theory. I think if everyone had good sex there would be no Muslim terrorists. If someone is having fantastic sex why on earth would they go looking for 30 or 40 (what's the count nowadays?) virgins in some green forest upstairs somewhere...

Continue to have good sex, and lots of it.
By Wandering Scarab on "Thou hast the keys of Paradise; Oh, just sex and mighty cocaine!"

I laughed my head off reading the post.. What wouldn't I give to be 20 again?
Breezing in and out, of love, sex, friendship..I am never tired of saying that humans are complex creatures, who have complex needs, no matter how much we try to theorize on the "basic instincts" and "immediate material needs", we are never completely certain if we understand ourselves enough, and hence our needs, to actually know how to fulfill them.
Or whether what we are doing, actually will fulfill these needs.
A man traveling through any city, looking for company is no dating material.
Any girl can tell you that.
Most girls know that.
So there goes your two eligible dates.
There remains Mr. K, your teenage crush, Jesus, all this puppy love makes me noxious.
Dump his sorry ass and find something better to do.
If a guy wants you, he will show it, he will say it, he would put a ring on it! *snap snap*
If he doesn't, then he doesn't and its not worth your time.

And what the hell with all the raving about S's party?? This is not the East Side!
You two faced bitch!
By E on "There's always a butt!"

its not about possession its about common decency
1. the guy sleeps with you the day before
2. you take him out to a party...
3. he leaves with another guy

we are not animals we dont need to have sex with different guys every day ... well eventhough we would like to...its not about possesion but it is about possesion we own this guy ... you are the only who knew him when you got him to the party and did him a favor rather than him sitting alone in his house... even if he didnt have sex with you... he shouldnt go have blatantly sex with another guy... again its about decency... and again we are not animals
By Q(aka S) on "Me & my possessive side, have you two met before?"

Hmmm..inside you seems like a comforting, warm and loving place to be. LOL !!
S and E from the UAE.
By S&E on "He's just not yet inside of me!"

bobo...cant help but comment, tho i never thought i would before...i know we tend to be over-analytical, but this is too much sweety...why dont u let things flow ? i dont see no vibes or nothing, just a normal after party least out of courtesy...yet i find it useful that you got tht idea he wasnt interested early enough...his answer wouldve been otherwise...donno, its too early...u know that kind of common sense...he seems like quite a sane and nice guy...see how it goes as friendship...can you try not to let him inside you ??

Xx , K
By K on "He's just not yet inside of me!"

K, i was sort of there with IQ that day it was interesting and i think his analysis are correct... i dont think he even way over analyzed .. actually what even suprized more about IQ was his reaction when i spoken to him the next day he was very mature in handling this.. like if i saw other guys in his situation and they met this stud .. and trust me oh he was a stud and not only just looks he had everything good as apackage they would have went all like "why was he not into me" "should i call him the next day" then they will send the guy a million messages... and i seen it happen infront of my own yes with other guys around him... IQ had a very chill responce which was like ...mmmmm yeaaa if he calls he calls if he doesnt eshta...and with regards to his entry being anylitical i dont know i thought it was the right amount its healthy for a person to look at himself and analyze whats happening in order to grow personally and learn from these new experiences

Q formerly known as S
By Q(aka S) on "He's just not yet inside of me!"

Haven't been around for a while. I came today and found that I have been quoated with that grain of love or hate! Thank you.
I enjoyed the post, and from now on "wearing Eltawheed Wel Nour in a room full of Chanel" will be my occasional words when they are relevant.

Don't get surprised even when it is the title of a new post of mine when I get the energy to show up again in my blog.

By Anonymous on "He's just not yet inside of me!"

Sweetheart, why are u so determined to be in a it for the sake of being committed to someone or do u really want to have someone?
I Guess u shall set ur requirements for a partner n if u stumble along ur path with someone who fits the picture and is showing mutual interest,then go for it and don't let it slip away...
we all are dependent in our own way and there no point from framing urself in a commitment where either u dont get what u need or ur not fulfilling the other part needs...
Hell be a Slut(in a good way)for as long as it takes...

Cute Lad from that beach theme party!!
By Anonymous on "Sigmund Freud, ANALyze this!"


  1. Oh Wow, amazing how judgemental we can be!!! who do I have to kill to know who died and made us judges and in charge? I would never understand why do we fear the other so much we become so obssessed with what we should be and how things should seem like that we loose ourselves in the process. I hope that the scars would never stop you from being you IQ. There is absloutely nothing wrong with that. Keep ranting my freind and we will keep listening :)

  2. Huh? I didn't quite get u! What did I say that implied what u said? Lol



    AS Sou-One-Canobee said we are quite the judgmental readers

  4. Posh: haha yeah, it was hard to choose from all the comments I've received all the year! =)

    Q: oh I'm sweet, I wouldn't do that to my readers! =P

  5. hey that's my username upthere...YUppieeeeeee....e7em..

    n u were so honest with the typos n all?!! impressive! la2 bravo...hehe...waR of writing hehe anniversary next year..put the following up as's something...

    "IceQueer...many a times I do really think that u represent the gay side of me..."

    huh? what do u think? Have a good one n a happy away.

  6. Haha thank u and u welcome!

    I'm glad I do, but we need 2 talk about that over MSN or something =P

    Btw read my prev post(Love well, whip well) I know u will like it and will have something to say!

  7. sure ya man...

    i read that post on the same day it was posted...ur on my blogroll, remember? my "Thank U" list :)
    yea I have something to say...but not all that can be said....mmm can actually be said..hehe LOL..whatever!! la2 I just got busy that day...just give me time to remember again what I wanted to say...but it's worth mentioning that on that same day u posted that post...I was too pondering the idea of BDSM...was heavily thinkin about it...n came up with a term, meaning or phrase such as the "BDSM of the Soul" what a coicidence?!! huh? that's when I realised that u actually represent my Gay side...


Feel free to speak out and leave a comment, I don't bite!